This is me
by Sapphire Angela Star
Summary: LJ.Song-fic. Lily ponders about her feelings for James.


**Just should you know, the last two phrases are Lily's P.O.V.**

**Disclaimer : I don't own Harry Potter or the characters & the song belongs to Disney**

**Channel. (adds realistic sigh here)**

Lily Evans was walking down Platform 9 and ¾, her flaming red hair making her more visible through the crowd. A few of her friends waved and smiled at her which she returned enthusiastically.

She let her eyes wonder round the platform until she saw _him_; the bespectacled boy with the jet black hair and hazel eyes. She felt a warm blush grow steadily on her cheeks.

However, the warm feeling popped the second she saw who he was talking to; Venessa Fawks. A Hufflepuff 6th year with blonde hair and blue eyes, chased by most of the school male population.

_I've always been the kind of girl  
That hid my face_

The sight brought a spark of jealousy that Lily never knew existed until today. Ok, so she admits that her crush on James has grown a little since 2nd year. But still…

She snapped out of her thoughts when she saw it. Venessa had actually wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him.

For some reason, Lily suddenly felt like melting into the floor. So instead of approaching them and making one of her snide remark like the old Lily would, she turned her heels and ran away.

_  
So afraid to tell the world  
What I've got to say  
But I have this dream_

_Right inside of me_

She felt herself slow down somewhere in the train, looking up she noticed it was the same compartment she shared with the marauders ever since she and James were on civilized speaking terms.

Inside, she found her friend Alice along with Sirius Black & Remus Lupin. She felt so numb, until she realized that someone was standing behind her and she was still standing at the door.

Hastily moving aside, she realized it was him. He gave her one of his grins, which made her blushed harder.

Unfortunately, the simple act of her cheeks growing steadily redder didn't go unnoticed by her friends. Sirius cocked an eye-brow while the others merely smirked. Alice even asked her if she was suffering from OJPD._  
_

_I'm gonna let it show, it's time  
To let you know  
To let you know_

God knows how glad she was when she knew that the marauders didn't know what OJPD stands for; Obsessive James Potter Disorder.

She just couldn't bring herself up to ask him casually about the scene at the platform, but her luck was in when Sirius mentioned it.

Trying not to look too interested, she listened to his tale. Only then did she know the truth; James had saved Venessa from being bullied by the Slytherins. They had been calling her names and even used a hover charm on her.

_  
This is real, this is me  
I'm exactly where I'm suppose to be, now  
Gonna let the light, shine on me  
Now I've found, who I am  
There's no way to hold it in  
No more hiding who I want to be  
This is me  
_

Relief washed over Lily when she found out. She didn't know why she cared that much, but the thought made her blushed even redder than before, clashing horribly with her hair.

_  
Do you know what it's like  
To feel so in the dark  
To dream about a life  
Where you're the shining star  
Even though it seems  
Like it's too far away  
I have to believe in myself  
It's the only way  
_

Luckily, this time no on noticed.

In the great hall,

Lily sat with her friends while listening to Prof. Dumbledore's speech. However her eyes would sometimes linger a little longer on the boy sitting 2 seats in front of her.

He hadn't ask her out in a few months, which was a shame since Lily found herself more and more willing to say yes if he asked her again.

_  
This is real, This is me  
I'm exactly where I'm suppose to be, now  
Gonna let the light, shine on me  
Now I've found, who I am  
There's no way to hold it in  
No more hiding who I want to be  
This is me_

The months flew by in a whiz; very soon they'll reach the end-of term.

James still hadn't asked Lily to go out with him and Lily felt slightly hurt at his behavior.

Saying something since she's the one who's been telling him for the past 3 years not to bother her.

Maybe, that wasn't what she wanted. Maybe she had wanted something more. Only now, she's afraid she might be too late.

_  
You're the voice I hear inside my head  
The reason that I'm singing  
I need to find you, I gotta find you  
You're the missing piece I need  
The song inside of me  
I need to find you, I gotta find you_

Graduation day was coming closer, just a mere 3 months before it all ends. Doing homework in the library with Alice, laughing with the marauders, patrolling with James, studying with him, staying up late and talking while they sat in front of the heads' dorm fire.

She guessed she was going to miss him the most.  
_  
This is real, this is me  
I'm exactly where I'm suppose to be, now  
Gonna let the light, shine on me  
Now I've found, who I am  
There's no way to hold it in  
No more hiding who I want to be  
This is me_

Later that week,

She had been sitting inside the common room, when he came. He tapped her on the shoulder and asked if he could talk to her for a while.

Slightly bewildered and a little exited, she followed him out of the portrait and down by the lake.

_  
You're the missing piece I need  
The song inside of me (this is me)_

He ran his fingers through his hair, an act she found out he'd do if he was nervous.

He turned towards her, and taking a deep breath, he stammered quickly.

"uhm, Lily, wo - would, you, you know, go to Hogsmead with me this wee – weekend. I know you've been saying no for the past 4 years, but I've been tr – trying really, really, REALLY hard this year not to bo – bother you so much. So, I guess if you would say yes then it would be a mi – miracle, so…" he said in one breath, and Lily was sure he could have continued if she didn't do something she herself hadn't expected.

_  
You're the voice I hear inside my head  
The reason that I'm singing_

Those words, the ones I've been waiting to hear for the past year. In other words, "Lily, will you go out with me?"

So, I did what I had and wanted to do. I stepped closer to him, pulled him down by his collar and gently connected our lips. I think I caught him unaware because it was some time before he responded.

His hands found themselves around my waist and my arms wrapped themselves around his neck. My fingers played with the hair at the back of his head and he lifted his right hand and placed it at my cheek, deepening the kiss.

We broke apart, breathless. He was blushing slightly and I guess my face wasn't much different either.

_Now I've found, who I am  
There's no way to hold it in_

He chuckled, "so, I'll take that as a yes, right?"

I nodded, I didn't want to have it any other way.

_  
No more hiding who I want to be  
This is me_


End file.
